The Crystal Rule – More Important than the Golden Rule

crystal heartMost of us grew up hearing “The Golden Rule”, which is, “Treat Others as You Want to be Treated.” While this holds great wisdom and advice I feel there is a more important rule we are not taught, even more critical for our well-being and life’s happiness.  I will call it, “The Crystal Rule” and will explain why I have chosen this name later.  The Crystal Rule is, “Treat Yourself as You Would Like Others to Treat You”.  As humans the majority of us share the trait of being difficult and sometimes even downright cruel to ourselves. If we are not exhibiting this with our actions including self-sabotaging, then we are using our words and self-talk to belittle and challenge ourselves.  If we stopped and thought about it we would recognize it is not motivating to berate ourselves, if anything it is self-defeating.  In most cases we would not dare utter the damning words we say to ourselves to a loved one, so why do we insist on continuing the barrage of negative comments to ourselves?  If we are telling ourselves of our limits, flaws and every seeming mis-step, then how could we possibly expect to be motivated enough to rise to a state of self-fulfillment and true joy?

We are truly mirrors reflecting to others how we want to be treated whether we are aware of it or not. So it is very important we know we are worth being treated well by others and to have a healthy dose of self-love and self-respect.  When we are sure of ourselves, confident, grateful for who we are and comfortable in our own skin we can attract people to us that will treat us with the respect we know in our hearts we deserve. 

We are taught from an early age of so many rules and expectations. The expectations from our parents, community or tribe, where we were raised along with the collective consciousness of existing as a human on this planet. We continue to judge ourselves with a running commentary every single day. It is important to recognize that we are all on this journey together and there are many lessons to be learned and on that path there will be some hiccups along the way. These challenges and hiccups are part of the learning process. Many times the most life-changing lessons are not learned without some challenges or downright struggle. During those struggles sometimes we will act in ways that in hindsight we might wish we didn’t but this is part of figuring it all out, learning and forward moving growth.

Just as we would tell a good friend it was “no big deal” or quickly forgive them if they said or did something that they regretted, we need to make it a habit to do the same for ourselves. Muttering to ourselves and repeating that moment over and over again will not erase it, instead it will give much more importance and power to it and keep us rooted in the past, where that event occurred.  Berating ourselves will not allow us the grace and self-confidence we need to move forward or to be be happy in the present moment and it can even leave us in a state of fear so powerful it is hard to envision a healthy and happy future.

In my practice as an alternative healing practitioner and mentor, the one commonality I have found is this judgment and challenge we have with falling in love with ourselves.  We can hug a loved one and truly feel that connection and unconditional love. Even if that loved one has made mistakes, isn’t “perfect” looking (whatever that means), and has some behaviors or traits that can use some work.  We can even do that with a pet who has destroyed a personal possession we held dear. We can feel that love in every part of our body when we think of them and know we would do anything for them and that the love we feel, is in fact, unconditional.  We need to begin to feel that unconditional love and forgiveness for ourselves on a daily basis.  If we did something where we felt we “messed up” we would certainly be repeating it to ourselves in our head’s all day (and possibly all night). Why not instead begin to tell ourselves how wonderful we are?  Beginning to concentrate on what we are grateful for in ourselves for making us, “us” can bring new found confidence.  Actively learning to forgive ourselves and being gentle with ourselves just as we would if a young child, a loved one or a pet did something we deem, “bad or wrong”. We would probably bring it to their attention but afterward we would be able to let it go, just as we need to do with ourselves. 

So why call it, “The Crystal Rule?”  Well maybe the fact that I am blown away by the powers of working with Andara Crystals right now in my healing practice allowed me to come up with it, but my reasoning goes way beyond that. So much study has gone into the creation of crystals as well as to how we, as humans are formed.  Crystals can form from a liquid or gas into many different beautiful shapes, colors and consistencies.  You may pick a crystal up and see it as imperfect, (it is not a perfect circle, triangle, etc. or perfectly smooth) but in fact they are all pretty miraculous.. just like each and every one of us. We need to embrace what some might call imperfections and recognize we are all indeed miracles ourselves.  The fact that we can breathe, have our heart beat and the many other systems our body manages without us having to think about it is miraculous. Our ability to store an incredible amount of information as some crystals are able to do is also mind blowing.  We are all different and beautiful just as the myriad of crystals and we too, have many different properties.   We are that “diamond” in the rough so to speak and have more beautiful aspects of ourselves than we ever give ourselves credit and gratitude for.

Some of my favorite crystals are the ones that have that character to them and are not by any means perfect as one might traditionally categorize them.  The life lessons we have learned along the way might be our nicks and scrapes but they are part of what makes us who we are and that is the perfection in our imperfections. This being human has its challenges but the more we fall in love with ourselves the more we allow others to fall in love with us.  The more gratitude we give ourselves the more we give others permission to be grateful for us. The more we are kind and forgiving to ourselves the more we invite others to be kind and forgiving to us.  So, please don’t just remember the Crystal Rule but try to live by the Crystal Rule and see how your life and relationships begin to change quickly for the better.

I love giving people tools on how to give back to themselves.  I am now offering 1, 3 and 6 month Wellness programs so I can assist you in aligning with the highest version of yourself to create the life you have dreamed of.  I will also be using tools and exercises from my upcoming book, “A Short Path to Change: 30 Ways to Transform Your Life” published by Llewellyn Publishing on January 8, 2016. I offer afree 1/2 hour consultations where people have felt shifts begin already. I would LOVE to work with you.

The Universe is Always Speaking to You – Are You Listening?

We are constantly receiving messages to keep our lives flowing effortlessly.  Most of us are wrapped up in the constant distractions, our lifelong patterns and the WAY WE HAVE decided things SHOULD BE/GO.  When we are so attached to our own stories and distractions we are truly resisting the Universes’ wisdom instead of allowing it to work WITH us.  The good news is we always have the option to tune in and ask ourselves, “are we resisting the flow or moving along with it?”. I would like to share a recent story in my own life where I had to overcome what I WANTED and THOUGHT I KNEW was best for me to “let go and bring myself back into flow”. I will also share a quick way to assess if you are in flow and to open yourself up to regaining that ease that is always available to us.

About 7 months ago I received wonderful news.  The book I have been writing for the last 2 years was accepted by a well known publisher. I was ecstatic but also now had a DEADLINE. I had written a little more than half of the book in 2 years and was now expected to write the next half in 7 months.  Everything had fallen into place quickly, I had a series of synchronistic events that led to me being able to present to the publisher and have it accepted, I met the perfect editor for my book and the words were flowing effortlessly whenever I did find/make the time to write. I was thrilled and all seemed to be very in flow.

Then “life” happened, as things came up as they often do and I refused to listen to the signs but continued to press on with my own agenda and schedule.  My step dad who had been in my life for 36 years became very ill suddenly and I watched as his life force and love of life dwindled away and left him 40 pounds lighter, a shadow of who he was, until he passed 6 months later, in late July 2014.  My children were very close to him, my mom IS my best friend, and being an only child, I knew I wanted to and needed to be there to be PRESENT for my family.  

My daughter is beginning middle school and had shown signs of stress as she readies for it. This along with the death of her grandfather and Robin Williams (her favorite actor/comedian) left her in a state of needing more attention and I wanted to be even more present for her and keep conversations going and open about the emotions she was going through.  My stress mounted any time I thought about or sat down to write my book, as I had my regular business to attend to, my house to upkeep, the summer that I wanted to participate in and not just watch go by, and the want/need to be there for my family. 

In the midst of all of this I was given a blessing from the Universe. A love and a man surpassing all possible expectations.  I had written my manifestation list (yup 2 page list) 😉 of what I wanted in a life partner but when he showed up my first thought was, “I said NOT UNTIL I FINISH MY BOOK UNIVERSE”!  He was everything on my list and some things I didn’t even know existed, but I resisted for all it was worth and watched every single fear come up. In time I did recognize the huge gift of his presence in my life and was able to sink totally into the feeling of love, knowing the Universe knows best and there was a reason he had arrived at this time.  He was there for me when my step dad was in his last stages and passed, he was there for me as I stressed out about finishing my book and he proved that even as challenging as life was becoming, there was also love, light and gifts beyond measure to receive from the Universe.  

While I was falling deeply in love I was aware that I DID suddenly want to spend each spare moment with him and when I wasn’t with him I was in that lala stage of thinking about him pretty constantly. I knew that also was taking up some of my time but it was also granting me JOY at a time when I was experiencing a lot of pain.  I still plodded along, changing my writing schedule to include the lofty task of writing 2-3 chapters a week instead of the 1 as the deadline approached.  I did recognize the words were NOT flowing as easily as they had. Now when I sat down to write I wasn’t just filled with the usual JOY of writing but also felt the stress of the deadline looming.  Soon-after, my editor who has been so wonderful, supportive and perfect in my creative process told me he could not possibly edit for the next month or so as his work tasks were picking up and even asked me if I could postpone the deadline. I finally had to listen.

In my head I had built up that postponing was some kind of “failure”. I had waited my whole life to be a published author. WAS this some kind of test that I had failed? My publishing company was clear on the deadline and let me know IF I wanted to be published by the fall of next year I WOULD need my COMPLETED book in by October 1, 2014.  I stressed, moped, cried, got angry and went through every possible emotion before I simply got very still, put my hand on my heart and asked, “What is in my best interest right now”?  The answer came so effortlessly that I was to contact my publisher and see what my options are. Also a KNOWING that putting off my book was NOT a failure but rather me looking out for myself and my loved ones as the last thing I wanted was to ADD to their stress – I wanted to be a help FOR THEM.  Contacting the publisher went better than I could have expected. She responded with warmth, understanding and told me if I got my book in by February it would be in the winter catalog instead of the fall catalog.  It all suddenly felt in flow again as I felt this huge stress that I had created release.

I don’t know why my book is delayed but I have no doubt it is in my best interest. Maybe it will be better received in the winter. Possibly I will be  learning something else that I would not have been able to incorporate if I had rushed to get it done. Perhaps my book will be THAT MUCH better because I will be writing from that place of ease and passion again instead of it feeling like a stressor. WHATEVER the reason(s) – I know it IS the way of flow. The relief I feel and joy and flow I have felt writing since is a sure fire indicator I am once again on the right path. Waiting 5 more months for something I have wanted since I was a child is not TOO much to ask Universe – I hear you and I AM listening.

A HUGE lesson I have learned in my last seven years of studying spirituality and personal development is that when we claim we KNOW WHAT IS BEST FOR US and the TIMELINE in which it is to be delivered.. more often than not we are NOT seeing the complete picture and there IS a BETTER way. It is in trusting, listening and NOT resisting that we can see that path and FIND our way.  The Universe IS always trying to show us the easiest and most advantageous path if we ARE willing to listen. 

The next time you feel “thrown off track” or like the Universe is conspiring against you, stop and get quiet, turn OFF the phone and distractions. Put your hand on your heart and ask WHY this might be happening and what IS the path of least resistance to lead you back into flow. Where is your YES and what feels good to you when you think about the next step? What ARE all your options? Try and notice what you are demanding of the Universe and the timeline you have insisted on and see if you can understand another way it can go that might BENEFIT you instead of creating stress.  We always have a path to take that is of less resistance. We have ALL experienced that state of flow where we feel life can seem almost magical – even if for a few moments. When we are on that path we truly do feel in flow, ease, joy which is how life is supposed to be. This is ALWAYS available to us – turn within and ask how you can return to this state and the answers WILL be waiting for you. Then relax and enjoy the ease, flow and JOY this brings!  Good luck on your journey and thank you for reading about my own.

PAGING ME SYSTEM – Awaken To Your Higher Self to Heal

tree meditationMy life truly began again in healing myself of several chronic illnesses. Instead of the dire future I was promised with chronic pain and ending up in a wheelchair, I gained health beyond what I had known in 7 years and a true sense of POWER over my own destiny. I also gained a love and passion deeply rooted in helping others also discover and harness that power. Not only to heal physically, emotionally and mentally but to truly begin to live the life of their dreams defying all odds or whatever they may have been continually told up until that point in their lives.  

Early on in my healing I was asked to write an article on “how I healed”. What came out was a System – “The P.A.G.I.N.G. M.E. System” which is an acronym that includes all the methods and tools I used to heal myself of 7 years of chronic illness in 3 weeks.  I have coached from this for the last 6 years with great results and as I gain new tools I add them in and share them with my clients.

This weekend, on Saturday March 1, 2014 in Oneonta, NY  I will be presenting about THE PAGING ME SYSTEM. How in waking up to consciousness, our Higher Self and self love we can truly become our BEST SELVES and live from our SOULS (who KNOW no limits). I hope if you are in the area you can join me. After that will be a 4 week class on Wednesday evenings that will include energy work, meditation and tools for moving through each part of this system. This also helps us to connect with our Higher Selves and heal from within.

I wanted to include the PAGING ME poem which describes this system simply. We often make things WAY more complicated than they need to be.  It might have taken 20, 30, 40 or 50 or more years to create the patterns we have in place but you can truly begin to see REAL changes in your life after a few days of implementing the techniques and tools.  I am an alternative healing practitioner but I know it is never truly ME doing the healing. I provide tools and the knowledge I have gathered so that my clients can begin to tap into their Higher Selves and heal from within. I am so excited to be teaching this workshop and for the classes that will follow. I hope if you are in the area you can join me on this journey. Enjoy the PAGING ME poem and I wish you all the best and send you many blessings for ALL areas of your life!

The P.A.G.I.N.G. M.E. System  by Jenny Mannion

The PAGING ME System is a way to connect
with your Higher, Inner self – your SOUL.
It is about awakening into consciousness to heal.
Embracing that connection and living from there is the goal.

P is for Pardoning, yourself and others
a step “challenging” for some two-fold.
You have to fall in love with yourself
And let go of blame, often deep seeded and OLD.

Cutting away at the thick ropes
that have kept you anchored in the past
allows for freedom, power and forward motion
the NOW and future are yours at last!

A is for Attention Shifting
from what is “bad” or hurts to what is right.
Wayne Dyer’s quote, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change”
can help you see things in a new light.

If you have a pain or stress that is recurring
one you feel physically or emotionally within
after observing, shift to an “anchor” or good time
allowing that positive vibration to win.

G is Gratitude for Everything
The most powerful healing tool of all.
When you stop to truly FEEL all that is good
your current “challenges” can cease to matter at ALL!

From the air you breathe, people you love, having clothes and food,
you will suddenly realize abundance is all around.
When you stop and truly EXPERIENCE this at its deepest level
more goodness and things to be grateful for ARE sure to abound.

I is for Influences, keep them positive
from news, situations and the friends that you choose.
Remember true all-weather energizing friendships win
Energy vampires, zap your energetic life force, too precious for you to lose.

N is for No Negative “Self talk”
Turn it around to see and say it in a positive way.
Even being stuck in traffic shifted to “Yes!, Time for reflecting and singing”
Can greatly change your outlook on the day.

G is for Goal Setting which is crucial
if you don’t know what you want, how can you possibly know the way there?
It is important to set mini goals to guide you
Think of it as climbing stair by stair.

M is for Meditation
which is transformational for your well being in a short amount of time.
A walk through nature, mantras, deep and conscious breaths
ALL will calm and soothe the non-stop ego-ic mind.

E is for Education
Your mind is YOURS to teach.
When you are learning things you are passionate about
You expand the levels of joy and satisfaction you can reach.

The Paging Me System simply put
are steps to heal, connect and learn from the true YOU.
By embracing, loving and living from that space
Life will be more in flow and joyful than you ever possibly knew!